Opinion: Don’t call this coffee an Americano!

“Canadiano with oat milk for Scooter—eh?”

Canadian news organizations report that some Canadian coffee shops have rechristened the coffee drinks that have long been called Americanos as Canadianos.

It’s their response to President Trump’s continuing threats of tariffs on Canadian goods, and his declaration that Canada ought to become the USA’s 51st state.

“We don’t need any American products right now,” Todd Simpson, who owns the Morning Owl coffeeshops in Ottawa, told CTV News. “It seems like a really good way to say we’re Canadian,” although the coffee beans they brew are more likely grown in Central America than, say, Alberta.

Canadians are famed for their courtesy and civility. But perhaps Americans have forgotten that Canada’s national sport is hockey: where the gloves come off, and there’s blood on the ice.

Bhavi Patel reported in Barista Magazine that the Americano coffee drink seems to have begun when American soldiers were stationed in Italy at the end of World War II. American G.I.’s had helped defeat Mussolini’s army. But they found traditional Italian espresso a little too intense to chug. Accommodating Italian baristas added hot water.

“The name ‘Americano’ does carry reported a bit of playful irony,” Stacey Lynden, the cupping manager for Canada’s Swiss Water company, told Barista, saying the Americano “to Italians might have seemed like a weaker, less refined version of their beloved espresso. So, while it wasn’t an outright joke, there was probably a little eye-rolling involved!”

Americans might accept being called “less refined.” But “weaker”?

If Canadian baristas hope to score a goal with this gesture, maybe they should concoct a grittier, distinctly Canadian brew. Mix grains of cobalt, mined in Labrador, with potash, quarried in Saskatchewan, and whisks of beaver tail, all of it steeped over sharp, jagged Yukon ice.

And when it’s ready, don’t just place the cup on a ledge, and call out a customer’s name. Tuck that Canadiano into the back of a hockey goal. Have the barista pull on a helmet and snarl: “You wanna get this drink the easy way, or the hard way? Eh?”

Transcript:

SCOTT SIMON, HOST:

A Canadiano with oat milk for Scooter (ph), eh? Canadian news organizations report that some Canadian coffee shops have rechristened the coffee drinks that have long been called Americanos as Canadianos. It’s their response to President Trump’s continuing threats of tariffs on Canadian goods and his declaration that Canada ought to become the USA’s 51st state. We don’t need any American products right now, Todd Simpson, who owns the Morning Owl coffee shops in Ottawa told CTV News. It seems like a really good way to say we’re Canadian, although the coffee beans they brew are more likely grown in Central America than, say, Alberta.

Canadians are famed for their courtesy and civility, but perhaps Americans have forgotten that Canada’s national sport is hockey, where the gloves come off and there’s blood on the ice.

Bhavi Patel reported in Barista Magazine that the Americano coffee drink seems to have begun when American soldiers were stationed in Italy at the end of World War II. American GIs had helped to defeat Mussolini’s army, but they found traditional Italian espresso a little too intense to chug. Accommodating Italian baristas added hot water. The name Americano does carry a bit of playful irony, Stacey Lynden, the cupping manager for Canada’s Swiss Water Company told Barista, saying the Americano, to Italians, might have seemed like a weaker, less refined version of their beloved espresso. So while it wasn’t an outright joke, there was probably a little eye-rolling involved. Americans might accept being called less refined. But weaker?

If Canadian baristas hope to score a goal with this gesture, maybe they should concoct a grittier, distinctly Canadian brew. Mix grains of cobalt mined in Labrador with potash quarried in Saskatchewan and whisks of beaver tail – all of it steeped over sharp, jagged Yukon ice. And when it’s ready, don’t just place the cup on a ledge and call out a customer’s name. Tuck that Canadiano into the back of a hockey goal. Have that barista pull on a helmet and snarl, you want to get this drink the easy way or the hard way, eh?

(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, “CANADA DAY, UP CANADA WAY”)

STOMPIN’ TOM CONNORS: (Singing) It’s Canada Day up Canada way on the first day of July, and we’re shouting hooray up Canada way when the maple leaf flies high.

 

David Gergen, adviser to 4 presidents, dies at 83

David Gergen worked in the administrations of Presidents Richard Nixon, Gerald Ford, Ronald Reagan and Bill Clinton as a speechwriter, communications director and counselor to the president, among other roles.

Preliminary report says fuel switches were cut off before Air India Boeing 787 crash

Indian investigators determined the Boeing 787 Dreamliner was properly configured and lifted off normally. But three seconds after takeoff, the engines' fuel switches were cut off.

2 years ago, Amanda Anisimova put down her racket. Now she’s in the Wimbledon final

Anisimova was a teenage tennis prodigy. But by 2023, tournaments had become "unbearable" for her mental health, and she stepped away. Now, she is a win away from her first Grand Slam title.

Guantánamo plea deals for accused 9/11 plotters are canceled by federal appeals court

A federal appeals court has canceled plea deals with three men accused of orchestrating the 9/11 attacks, deepening the legal morass surrounding the long-stalled case.

Gen Z is afraid of sex — and for good reason

Gen Z is in a sex recession. Not because they're less horny, but because they're more afraid.

Nigeria says it won’t accept U.S. deportees: “We have enough problems of our own”

Nigeria's government is pushing back against U.S. efforts to send them migrants and foreign prisoners, with Nigerian Foreign Minister Yusuf Tuggar quoting Public Enemy to drive home his point.

More Front Page Coverage