A stranger helps a grieving daughter clean her mother’s grass-covered gravestone

Laura Kwerel | April 15, 2025

This story is part of the My Unsung Hero series, from the Hidden Brain team. It features stories of people whose kindness left a lasting impression on someone else.

When Ashley Blas was 7 years old, her mother passed away. They were living in New York at the time and her mother was buried in her hometown of Chicago.

In 2023, nearly 30 years later, Blas decided to fly to Chicago to visit her mother’s grave for the first time since the funeral.

She used a car service to drive her to the cemetery. That morning, a sleek black car with tinted windows pulled up to her hotel, driven by a man in a suit. Blas came down to greet him, holding the pink roses she had brought to place on the grave.

“ I’m feeling disheveled because I’m nervous and grieving,” she recalled. “And he opens the door and greets me kindly.”

When they got to the cemetery, Blas got out of the car, forgetting the flowers, and began to search for her mother’s gravestone. The driver stood near the car, giving her space.

“I look around and I was just overwhelmed. There were just so many gravesites,” Blas said. “I look up at the driver and he’s looking at me. And he could tell that I was getting more and more distressed.”

Then Blas looked down and realized she was standing right in front of her mother’s grave marker.

“And the driver, he calls out … ‘Did you find it?'” Blas said. “I just start sobbing. And I’m trying to choke through my tears and tell him, ‘Yes, I found it.'”

The man ran over with a box of tissues. He looked down and noticed that grass was covering part of the marker. Then, in his full suit, he dropped to his knees and started ripping away the grass and dirt.

“He is just clawing away at it, trying to reveal the entire stone,” Blas said. ”Wiping the grave away with his hand, dusting it away just so that I can see.”

When Blas had first found it, she was only able to see her mother’s name and dates of birth and death.

“But he was so kind as to really clean that stone, so that it revealed that it said, ‘Beloved mother of Angela and Ashley,’ Angela being my sister,” Blas said.

“And that is when I really just started sobbing very, very hard just to see that on my mother’s grave.”

The man offered her another tissue and then walked back to the car to give her time to herself. A few minutes later, he returned with the flowers she had forgotten.

“I will never forget that moment of humanity,” Blas said. “And I’ll never forget seeing this really kind individual — it didn’t matter that he was in his full suit. He just helped me through that moment and so I will never forget his kindness.”

Ashley Blas (left), her mother Doris Arrington (middle) and her sister Angela in 1988. (Ashley Blas)

My Unsung Hero is also a podcast — new episodes are released every Tuesday. To share the story of your unsung hero with the Hidden Brain team, record a voice memo on your phone and send it to myunsunghero@hiddenbrain.org.

Transcript:

AILSA CHANG, HOST:

Time now for “My Unsung Hero,” our series from the team at the Hidden Brain podcast. “My Unsung Hero” tells the stories of people whose kindness left a lasting impression on someone else, and today’s story comes from Ashley Blas. When Blas was 7 years old, her mother died. Nearly 30 years later, in 2023, Blas decided to fly to Chicago to visit her mother’s grave for the first time since the funeral. She reserved a ride with a car service to get to the cemetery, and that morning, a sleek, black car with tinted windows pulled up to her hotel, driven by a man in a suit. When they got to the cemetery, Blas began to look for her mother’s grave, and the driver stood near the car, giving her space.

ASHLEY BLAS: I’m just kind of wandering through this cemetery. And I look up at the driver, and he’s looking at me, and he could tell that I was getting more and more distressed. And so I looked down, and all of a sudden, I’m standing on my mother’s grave. I could see her name. And the driver, he calls out. He said, did you find it? And I just start sobbing. And I’m trying to choke through my tears and tell him, yes, I found it.

And so he runs over with a box of tissue, and he looks down at it, and he notices that the grave stone was covered. You know, you could see that it was a little bit overgrown because it had just been there for such a long time. And so he just dropped to his knees immediately and starts digging at the grass and the dirt, and he is just clawing away at it, trying to reveal the entire stone.

And when I found it, I had only – was only able to see my mother’s name and her date of birth and date of death, but he was so kind as to really clean that stone so that I could – it revealed that it said, beloved mother of Angela and Ashley – Angela being my sister. And that is when I really just started sobbing very, very hard. Once he cleans off and clears this grave, he walks away back to the car and allows me to have the time that I really felt like I needed.

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC)

BLAS: I will never forget that moment of humanity, and I’ll never forget seeing this really kind individual. You know, it didn’t matter that he was in his full suit, wiping the grave away with his hand. He just helped me through that moment, and so I will never forget his kindness, and I think he’s my unsung hero.

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC)

CHANG: Ashley Blas lives in Columbia, South Carolina. You can find more stories of unsung heroes and learn how to submit your own at hiddenbrain.org.

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC)